Odd Mood

I’m in an odd mood tonight. I have a lot going through my head. A lot of it goes back to the fact that I talked to someone about buying the house today. That left me feeling really anxious. I’ve felt ever since like I was just on the edge of panic.
Mara tells me if we sell the house I’ll be in the free and clear. That blows my mind. I’m giving up the only place I’ve ever thought of as home and going to live on a truck for God knows how long. She thinks being homeless is being free and clear? She clearly has no clue how much selling this house is going to kill me. My heart is breaking here.
Anyway, talking to the guy sort of took my breath away. The end really is near. Somehow I think I had convinced myself that something could be worked out in the end.
I also feel really weird about shifting energies. Of late I’ve been back in touch with Tony Rogers, who I jammed with once upon a time. I was a little surprised to find out that anyone would want to talk to me. Tony’s been really cool, and he’s given me Mike Peeler’s number, as well, so I can theoretically annoy Peeler at some point. And tonight I had a special friend add request on MySpace. It was from Justin, my brother. I haven’t heard from him in over a year, and I had no idea what had happened to him.
I don’t know what, but I feel like something is shifting here. I feel like some tipping point has been reached, and I don’t know why. To my knowledge I haven’t done anything to make this happen. But I feel like a lot of positive energy is coming my way. It freaks me out a little bit, to be honest. In the space of a few weeks I’ve been presented an intriguing possibility (more on that later). I’ve gotten in touch with someone whom I consider a friend, whom I hadn’t heard from in ten years. And my long lost brother suddenly says hello on MySpace.
In short, I feel like the Universe is playing with me. It makes me nervous.

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